Random Anxiety

Warning... this post has a slight yuck factor as well as mostly just my own random grumbling thoughts so I can look back and laugh at myself.

To start at the beginning - I've been taking a course on the history of modern China as part of my degree program. All I can say is that I'm a pretty sensitive person to violence, blood, gore, etc. Well anyone who knows much about the history of modern China (obviously not me or I should have known better than to take the course) knows that violence, blood, and gore make up a significant portion of the history. That being said, this course has been quite emotionally draining on me. Over the past few days I've been reading a book for a paper that I need to write this weekend. So in addition to the typical anxiety of having a paper due I had the emotional ups and downs (mostly downs but thankfully not as much as I was worried) that went along with reading the book.

So finally this morning I finished the book and decided it would probably good to have a little break out in the fresh air to help brighten my spirits. Since I still wanted to make my break productive I decided to get out the lawn mower (WARNING...yuck factor coming...) I started the mower only to discover that the engine was housing a litter of baby rats or mice. I'll just say that my discovery was not a pleasant one - blood and tiny little mangled body parts were involved. Now I don't normally mind nature taking it's course... actually the experience has left me thinking seriously about getting a cat that could handle the problem in the circle of life fashion. I also definitely don't like the idea of rats in the garage but we'll just say that the way that it happened resulted in successive phone calls to Mark and my mother while I attempted to calm myself enough handle the situation. I tried to convince myself that it was just the shock of the situation that affected me so deeply but then I realized with irony... there's no way to plan for such a thing happening so of course there's really no way to eliminate the shock factor... not a pleasant realization.

All in all I don't think I screamed and I didn't loose my breakfast and I handled the cleanup on my own (something I wasn't sure I would be able to do) so I consider it a personal success story. An hour later I'm still not sure that my pulse has returned to normal but I'm okay.

On the other hand, Alicia barely seemed phased. She came out and looked - probably trying to figure out why mommy was acting like a crazy person. She saw them, saw the blood, but it seemed like just a pretty matter of fact happening for her - it happened and that's just the way it was. Of course then she has to start in creating the story of how the mother is going to come back looking for the babies and wonder what happened. I had to remind myself that she's five and the idea of a guilt trip is still beyond her comprehension so it wasn't intentionally made to make me feel bad. (I hate to think what she'll come up with when she realizes exactly how powerful guilt can be...)

So I didn't exactly get the break from the violence, blood, and gore as I had planned... in fact I had it displayed before me in vivid colors (even if it was on a much tinier scale... unless of course you're asking the rats who probably look at me as worse than Godzilla) that will probably result in lots of horrible imaginings over the next few days. Where's Disneyland when you need it?

Independance Day - Part 2 With Friends

We were invited over to some friends in Claremont to watch the fireworks from their house. (Okay, yes, I'm still a little bitter that they had to cancel the big show that was right across the street from us... I really hope they will bring it back because it was a great event for our little town.) There was quite the group gathered and everyone had a good time relaxing together. I charged the battery on my camera and took a few more shots of the fun.

We killed time with our own mini display while waiting for the big event.


The three little men - these guys are just too cute. All of them wanted the front seat of the John Deere Power Wheels (that thankfully didn't go anywhere without someone pushing it). Notice that Ryan is in the driver's seat... sheer stubborn determination, the other two would actually go play, have fun, and chase the fireworks but Ryan never left his post.

Alicia with a sparkler... definitely my girl....

I've got to say there is nothing like watching a fireworks display with a big group of kids. Even Ryan enjoyed creating a running commentary with various combinations of "look" "over tere" "fire" "boom" "wow" and "yay".

Independence Day - Part 1 Boston

I have to say that our Independence Day turned out very little like I had thought it would. Still it was a wonderful day and we had lots of fun family time. We drove down to the Boston Temple first thing in the morning - on a side note, yes, I knew that it would be closing soon for cleaning but for some reason I thought I had heard it was closing on the 7th. So anyways we arrived and it was empty and instantly I realized my mistake. By this time we were all aching for a chance to stretch our legs a bit so we decided to walk around for a while and look at the gardens and take some pictures etc. Of course the battery on my camera goes dead and when I put in the back up battery we found out that I had forgotten to charge it after last time. Needless to say I didn't feel very intelligent.
Still we made the best out of it and after driving around a bit decided to go and visit the Lexington Green where the 1st shots of the Revolution were fired. I love that area and the deep roots of our nation's history that were there. To walk those roads I can not help but pause and marvel at the dedication of those great men and be thankful for their sacrifice and willingness to defend the cause of freedom. There was a tree near the green that was unmarked but it was so huge and magnificent that it must have been there since at least the time of the revolution if not before. I just had to touch it and if I could have gotten away with hugging it and not looking completely ridiculous I would have. Once again I sighed at myself for not planning and checking my camera before we left.